5 Jokes a day Keeps Doctor Away!

Prince Charles & Santaji were having dinner.
Prince said, “Pass the wine you divine”.
Santa thinks “how poetic”
Santa says, “pass the custard you bastard”.
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Santa at bar in New York .
Man on his right says “Johny Walker single”
Man on his left says “Peter Scotch single”
Santa says - “Baljith Singh Married”
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Boss : am giving u job as a driver. STARTING salary Rs.2000/-, is it o.k
Santa : U R great sir! Starting salary is o.k…….but? ?
how much is DRIVING salary…?
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Santa’s theory : Moon is more impt than Sun, coz it gives light at
night when light is needed & Sun gives light during  the day when light
is not needed!!!
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2 Santas are driving a Car, one puts on the indicator and asks the
other to check whether its working, he puts his head out and says
YES…NO…YES. ..NO…YES. ..NO…
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Santa shouting 2 his girl friend ” u said v will do register marriage
and cheated me, I was waiting 4 u yesterday whole day in the post
office….
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Santa is in a dissection class of cockroach. He cuts its 1 leg, and
says, “chal”, it walks.
He cuts 2nd and 3rd legs and said, “chal” , it walks.
He cuts all the legs and said, “chal….” Finally he wrote the conclusion.. ….
……. “after all the legs of a cockroach are cut - it be comes deaf……”
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A Tamilian call up Santa and asks  ” tamil therima??”
Santa got mad, angrily replied…. “Hindi tera baap!!!”
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2 Santajis looking at Egyptian mummy.
Sar 1 : Look so many bandages, pakka lorry accident case.
Sar 2 : Aaho, lorry num be r is also written…BC 1760!!!….
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A Santa on an interview 4 da post detective.
Interviewer : who killed Gandhi?
Santa : Thank u sir 4 giving me d job, I will start investigating. ……
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A Santa for an exam had studied only one essay ‘FRIEND’, but in the
exam the essay which came was ‘FATHER’ . he replaced friend with father
in the essay and>it read:  AM A VERY FATHERLY PERSON, I HAVE LOTS OF FATHERS,
SOME OF MY FATHERS ARE MALE AND SOME ARE FEMALE. MY TRUE
FATHER IS MY NEIGHBOUR.
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Interviewar: what s ur qualification?
Santaji : Sir I am Ph.d.
Interviewar : what do u mean by Ph.d?
Santaji : (smiling) PASSED HIGHSCHOOL with DIFFICULTY.. ..
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Amitab : In which state Cauvery flows?
Santa : liquid state…..
Audience clapped.. Amitab stunned, looks be hind,  ALL WERE SantaS….. ..