5 Jokes a day Keeps Doctor Away!

HER DIARY

I asked him what was wrong - he said,
“Nothing.”

I asked him if it was my fault that
he was upset. He said ithad nothing
to do with me and not to worry.

On the way home, I told him that
I loved him, but he simply smiled and kept driving.

I can’t explain his behaviour; I don’t
know why he didn’t say, “I love you too.”

When we got home, I felt as if I had lost
him, as if he wanted nothing to do with me
anymore.

He just sat there and watched TV; he
seemed distant and absent.

Finally, I decided to go to bed. About
10 minutes later he came to bed.

I decided that I could not take it
anymore, so I decided to confront him with the situation
but he had fallen asleep.
I started crying and cried until I fell asleep.
I do not know what to do. I’m almost sure that his
thoughts are with someone else.
My life is a disaster.  

HIS DIARY

Today India lost the match again.
DAMN IT…

    Boss: Where were you born?

    Santa : Punjab ..

    Boss : which part ?

    Santa : Kya which part ? Whole body born in Punjab.

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    Santa and Banta were fixing a bomb in a car.

    Santa  : What would you do if the bomb explodes while fixing.

    Banta : Dont worry, I have one more.

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    Santa : What is the name of your car ?

    Lady : I forgot the name, but is starts with “T”.

    Santa : Oye Kamaal ki gaadi hai, Tea se start hoti hai. Hamaara gaadi

    petrol se start hoti hai.

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     Santa was busy removing a wheel from his auto. A man asks Santa why

    are you removing a wheel from your auto.

    Santa : Cant you read the board. Parking is only for 2 wheeler.

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     Santa got into a bus on 1st April when conductor asked for ticket. He

    gave Rs.10/- and took the ticket and said April fool. I have pass.

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     Santa joined new job. 1st day he worked till late evening on the

    computer. Boss was happy and asked what you did till evening.

    Santa : Keyboard alphabets were not in order, so I made it alright.

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    On a romantic day Santa’s girlfriend asks him. Darling on our

    engagement day will you give me a ring.

    Santa : Ya sure, from landline or mobile.

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    How will you destroy a submarine full of Santas ?

    Simple. Just knock the door and they will open it….

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    Santa apni girl friend ko I Luv U kehta hai aur gir jata hai.

    Gal: Yeh kya kar rahe ho?

    Santa: I’m falling in love.

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    A man to Santa: Aao ji chess khelein

    Santa: Tu chal mein sports shoes pehen kar aaya.

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    At the scene of an accident a man was crying: O God! I have lost my

    hand, oh!

    Santa: Control yourself. Don’t cry. See that man. He has lost his

    head.

    Is he crying?

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 Santa was getting bitten by mosquitoes the whole night. He got

    irritated… drank poison & said, Ab kaato saalon, sab maroge!

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    Banta: U cheated me.

    Shopkeeper: No, I sold a good radio to u.

    Banta: Radio label shows Made in Japan but radio says This is all India

    Radio!

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    NOW THE LAST Two ULTIMATE one :

    In an interview, Interviewer: How does an electric motor run?

    Santa: Dhhuuuurrrrrrrrrr. …..

    Inteviewer shouts: Stop it.

    Santa: Dhhuurrrr dhup dhup dhup…

   ************************************************************************************ 

    Tourist: Whose skeleton is that?

    Santa: Tipu’s skeleton.

    Tourist: Whose that smaller skeleton next to it?

    Santa: That was Tipu’s skeleton when he was child

 

A wife mentioned to her husband that for her birthday,

she would like something that accelerates from 0 to 100 in four seconds.

She was expecting something like this……..….

But her husband presented her with something very different…

 

Before the marriage:

He: Yes. At last. It was so hard to wait.
She: Do you want me to leave?
He: NO! Don’t even think about it.
She: Do you love me?
He: Of course!
She: Have you ever cheated on me?
He: NO! Why you even asking?
She: Will you kiss me?
He: Yes!
She: Will you hit me?
He: No way! I’m not such kind of person!
She: Can I trust you?
He: Yes.

Now after the marriage you can read it from below to up !!!!