Jul 15
Jul 03
Vidhya: hey! what is the matter you have called up all of a sudden?
Nithya : do u remember that my parents gave my horoscope, to search for a
suitable match, to many people? So many horoscopes of the groom has come..
in that 4-5 seems to match.. I don’t know which one to select, I am
confused because of it.
Vidhya: what is the confusion about?
Nithya: horoscopes of many software engineers have come. It seems now a
days, the software guys are wanting to marry girls in the other field.
That’s I why I don’t know whom I must select among this. You are a
software engineer na pls give me some suggestion .
vidhya: not a problem at all. So tell me the position that each one holds.
nithya: first is a manager.
vidhya: manager?? Then he will showcast himself that he is busy always. But
he will not do anything properly. He will get u 1 kg of rice and ask you to
prepare for the whole area say a village. He will get you mutton and ask
you to prepare chicken 65. Even if you protest telling you can’t make it,
he’ll not accept. He will tell you to work hard day and night to prepare
it. He will also tell he’ll provide you with the night cab. Even if you ask
how can I prepare chicken 65 out of it by sitting day and night he will not
accept.
Nithya: ohh..so dangerous he is!! Then I must escape. Next is a test
engineer.
vidhya: he is more dangerous than the other person. Whatever you do he will
correctly tell only the fault in it. Even if you try to surprise him with
10 variety of food, he will tell the item which does not have salt in it.
If you ask him “will you not at least tell that it is good”, he will reply
back saying it is your duty to make it good so why must I tell that. He is
sooo good.
Nithya: then a NO to him also. Next is the performance test engineer.
vidhya: he is another specimen.. even if everything is good, he will ask
why did it take this much time. If you take 10 minutes to make a coffee, he
will question you asking why you have taken 10 min for a coffee which can
be done within 5 min. Even if you say that he is talking about the instant
coffee while you have made the filter coffee, he will not accept. The same
will be with all the work you do. You must not think about this person if
you want to do make up in your life !!!
Nithya: then! you mean to say that we should not marry software guys??
Vidhya: who said like that?? In software there is one more group. They are
called the developers group. How much ever you hit them they will bear.
Nithya: then tell about them.
Vidhya: you don’t have to do anything. They will do everything themselves.
If we sit back and just boost them it is enough. But the problem with them
is- they will say “I know it” whatever you ask them.
Even that is ok. They will bear how much ever you hit them but the
condition is you must keep saying “you are too good” after hitting them
every time.
Nithya: this is superb. Then we must search for this kind of a groom….
hahaha….
Jun 16
Equation 1
Human = eat + sleep + work + enjoy
Donkey = eat + sleep
Therefore,
Human = Donkey + work + enjoy
Therefore,
Human - enjoy = Donkey + work
In other words,
Human that don’t enjoy = Donkey that work
===================================================
Equation 2
Men = eat + sleep + earn money
Donkeys = eat + sleep
Therefore,
Men = Donkeys + earn money
Therefore,
Men - earn money = Donkeys
In other words,
Men that don’t earn money = Donkeys
====================================================
Equation 3
Women = eat + sleep + spend
Donkeys = eat + sleep
Therefore,
Women = Donkeys + spend
Therefore,
Women - spend = Donkeys
In other words,
Women that don’t spend = Donkeys
=====================================================
To Conclude:
From Equation 2 and Equation 3
Men that don’t earn money = Women that don’t spend.
So, Men earn money not to let women become Donkeys!(Postulate 1)
And, Women spend not to let men become Donkeys!(Postulate 2)
So, we have.
Men + Women = Donkeys + earn money + Donkeys + spend money
Therefore.from Postulates 1 and 2, we can conclude
Man + Woman = 2 Donkeys that live happily together!
May 23
Men:
1. All men are extremely busy.
2. Although they are so busy, they still have time for women.
3. Although they have time for women, they don’t really care for them.
4. Although they don’t really care for them, they always have one
around.
5. Although they always have one around them, they always try their luck
with others.
6. Although they try their luck with others, they get really pissed off
if the women leaves them.
7. Although the women leaves them they still don’t learn from their
mistakes and still try their luck with others.
Women:
1. The most important thing for a woman is financial security.
2. Although this is so important, they still go out and buy expensive
clothes.
3. Although they always buy expensive clothes, they never have something
to wear.
4. Although they never have something to wear, they always dress
beautifully.
5. Although they always dress beautifully, their clothes are always just
“an old rag”.
6. Although their clothes are always “just an old rag”, they still
expect You to compliment them.
7. Although they expect you to compliment them, when you do, they don’t
Believe you… :-]]
Apr 10
1. Long back,
a person who sacrificed his sleep,
forgot his family,
forgot his food,
fogot laughter were called
“Saints”
But now they are called..
“IT professionals”
2 .An interesting line written at the back of a Biker’s T Shirt:
” If you are able to see this, Please tell me that my galfriend has fallen off”
3. Most Relationships fail not because of the absence of love..
Love is always present..
Its just that,
One loves too much,
and
The other loves too many,
4.
Employee: Boss, Now i have got married..! Please increase my salary..!
BOSS: Factory is not responsible for accidents occuring outside the company..!
5.
Philosophy of life
At the begining of married life, every gal treats her husband as GOD,
Later on somehow the alphabets got reversed..!
6. What is a Fear?
Fear is the Deep, Wrenching feeling in your stomach
When pages of your book still smell new
and
Just few hours left for your exams..!
7. Jus4Fun
Someone has rightly said, “A fool can ask More questions that a wise man cannot answer”
No Wonder why so many of us speechless when lecturers ask question..!
8.Girl: Do you have Cards with sentimental Love quotes?
Shopkeeper: Oh sure..@! How about this card, it says “To the only boy I ever loved.!”
Girl: Thats good, Give me 12 of them..!
9 .
After reading the form filled by an applicant.. The employer said: ” WE do have an opening for you..!
Applicant: What is it?
Interviewer: Its called the “door..!”
10 .A Banner cum Sign Board In front of an IT company..
Drive Slowly, Dont kill our Employee…
….. Leave them to us
Dec 04
1. Illiterate? Write today for free help.
(man….if only I knew A B C….)
2. Auto Repair Service. Free pick-up and delivery. Try us once; you’ll never go anywhere again.
(sure…thanx for the warning!)
3. 3-year old teacher needed for pre-school. Experience preferred.
(in months or years?)
4. Used Cars: Why go elsewhere to be cheated. Come here first.
(check it out)
5. Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children.
(howwww sweeeet)
6. Man wanted to work in dynamite factory. Must be willing to travel.
(wow! A free trip to heaven?)
7. Tired of cleaning yourself. Let me do it.
(uh…huh!)
8. Wanted. Man to take care of cow that does not smoke or drink.
(hey….who taught cows the bad habit??)
9. We do not tear your clothing with machinery. We do it carefully by hand.
(nice work!)
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