Custom Search
Watch the latest videos on YouTube.com


    

Great Story !!!

Enjoy No Comments »

A father put his three year old daughter to bed,
told her a story and listened to her prayers which she ended by saying
“God bless Mommy, God bless daddy, God bless grandma and good-bye grandpa.”

The father asked, “Why did you say good-bye grandpa?”
The little girl said, “I don’t know daddy, it just seemed like the thing to
do.”

The next day grandpa died.

The father thought it was a strange coincidence.

A few months later the father put the girl to bed and
listened to her prayers, which went like this:
“God bless Mommy, God Bless daddy and good-bye grandma.”

The next day the grandmother died.

Oh my god, thought the father, this kid is in contact with the other side.

Several weeks later when the girl was going to bed the dad heard her say,
“God bless Mommy and good-bye daddy.”

He practically went into shock.
He couldn’t sleep all night and got up at the crack of dawn to go to his
office.
He was nervous as a cat all day, had lunch sent in and watched the clock.
He figured if he could get by until midnight he would be okay.
He felt safe in the office, so instead of going home at the end of the day
he stayed there,
looking at his watch and jumping at every sound.

Finally midnight arrived, he breathed a sigh of relief and went home.

When he got home his wife said
“I’ve never seen you work so late, what’s the matter?”
He said “I don’t want to talk about it, I’ve just spent the worst day of my
life.”

She said “You think you had a bad day, you’ll never believe what happened
HERE.

He asked “What”??????

She said “This morning our neighbor James suddenly died.”

Tech Support

Enjoy No Comments »

Actual telephone conversations with your friendly neighborhood tech support.

Customer:
I’m trying to connect to the Internet with your CD, but it just doesn’t work. What am I doing wrong?
Tech support
: OK, you’ve got the CD in the CD drive, right?
Customer:
Yeah….
Tech support :
And what sort of computer are you using?
Customer:
Computer? Oh no, I haven’t got a computer. It’s in the CD player and all I get is weird noises. Listen…..
Tech support :
Aaaarrrrgggghhhh!!!

===============

Tech support :
What kind of computer do you have?
Customer :
A white one…

===============

Tech support :
Click on the ‘my computer’ icon on the left of the screen.

Customer:
Your left or my left?

===============

Tech support :
Good day. How may I help you?
Male customer :
Hello… I can’t print.
Tech support :
Would you click on “start” and…
Customer:
Listen pal; don’t start getting technical on me! I’m not Bill Gates, damn it!

===============

Customer:
Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can’t print. Every time I try, it says ‘Can’t find printer’.

                   I’ve even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor,

                   But the computer still says he can’t find it…

===============

Customer :
I have problems printing in red…
Tech support :
Do you have a color printer?
Customer:
Aaaah………………..thank you I forgot about that.
===============

Tech support :
What’s on your monitor now, ma’am?
Customer:
A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me in the supermarket.

===============

Customer :
My keyboard is not working anymore.
Tech support :
Are you sure it’s plugged into the computer?
Customer:
No. I can’t get behind the computer.
Tech support:
Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back.
Customer:
OK
Tech support :
Did the keyboard come with you?
Customer:
Yes
Tech support :
That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another keyboard?
Customer:
Yes, there’s another one here. Ah…that one does work!

===============

Customer:
I can’t get on the Internet.
Tech support :
Are you sure you used the right password?
Customer:
Yes, I’m sure. I saw my colleague do it.
Tech support :
Can you tell me what the password was?
Customer:
Five stars.

===============

Tech support :
How may I help you?
Customer:
I’m writing my first e-mail.
Tech support :
OK, and what seems to be the problem?
Customer :
! Well, I have the letter ‘a‘ in the address, but how do I get the circle around it?

===============

A woman customer called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer.
Tech support :
Are you running it under windows?
Customer:
“No, my desk is next to the door, but that is a good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his printer is working fine.” 

Good ones!!!!!

Enjoy No Comments »
If the Titanic was made in India

1) There would be 10 times as many people on the ship

2) There would be a song with Kate Winslet in a white saree and of course

Singing in the rain

3) The movie would be called “Pyar Kiya To Marna Kya”

4) Hero and Heroine would float in cold water for days and still survive,

But the villian would die in the first dip

5) The iceberg would be sent by the heroine’s father to teach the hero a

Lesson

6) None of the women would float due to heavy designer sarees.


And last but not least

7) Half of the rescue boats would be reserve for SC/ST/OBC

*******************************************************************************

Ever Wondered..How wud sum common english sayings translate in hindi???

Have a nice day! —– * Achcha din lo!

What’s up? —– *Uppar kya hai?

You’re kidding! —– *Tum bachcha bana rahe ho!

Don’t kid me! —– * Mera bachcha mat banaao!

Cool man! —–* Thandaa aadmi!

Check this out, man! —-* Iskee chaanbeen karo, aadmi!

Don’t mess with me, dude.—– * Mere saath gandagi mat karo, e vyakti.

She’s so fine! —– * Woh itnee baareek hai!

Listen buddy, that chick’s mine, okay!?—– * Suno dost, woh chooza mera hai, theek?

Hey good looking; what’s cooking? —-* Arrey sundarta ki devi; kya pakaa rahee ho?

Are you nuts? —– * Kya aap akhrot hain?

Son of a gun.—– * Bachcha bandook ka.

Rock the party. —- * Party mein patthar feko.


And the best ones are…..


How do you do? —– * Kaise karte ho?

Keep in touch…… * Chhoote Raho.

Lets hang out!….*Chalo bahar latakte hai

@  “”He worked by day And toiled by night.  He gave up play And some delight.

Dry books he read, New things to learn. And forged ahead, Success to earn.

He plodded on with  Faith and pluck;  And when he won,Men called it luck …” -Anonymus

 


	  

Kool Question and the Answers……

Enjoy No Comments »

Q. How can you drop a raw egg onto a concrete floor without cracking it?
A. Concrete floors are very hard to crack! (UPSC Topper)

——————————————————–

Q. If it took eight men ten hours to build a wall, how long would it take four men to build it?
A. No time at all it is already built. (UPSC 23 Rank Opted for IFS)

——————————————————–

Q. If you had three apples and four oranges in one hand and four apples and three oranges in the other hand, what would you have?
A. Very large hands.(Good one) (UPSC 11 Rank Opted for IPS)

——————————————————–

Q. How can you lift an elephant with one hand?
A. It is not a problem, since you will never find an elephant with one hand.
(UPSC Rank 14 Opted for IES)

——————————————————–

Q. How can a man go eight days without sleep?
A. No Probs, He sleeps at night. (UPSC IAS Rank 98)

——————————————————–

Q. If you throw a red stone into the blue sea what it will become?
A. It will Wet or Sink as simple as that. (UPSC IAS Rank 2)

——————————————————–

Q. What looks like half apple?
A: The other half. (UPSC - IAS Topper)

——————————————————–

Q. What can you never eat for breakfast?
A: Dinner.

——————————————————–

Q. What happened when wheel was invented?
A: It caused a revolution.

——————————————————–

Q. Bay of Bengal is in which state?
A: Liquid (UPSC 33Rank)

——————————————————–

Q: what is the opposite of Nag panchmi?
A: Nag did not punch me

Evolution of A software Engineer……..

Enjoy No Comments »


High School/Jr.High

10 PRINT “HELLO WORLD”
20 END

First year in College
program Hello(input, output)

begin

writeln(’Hello World’)

end.


Senior year in College
(defun hello
(print

(cons ‘Hello (list ‘World))))


New professional
#include
void main(void)

{

char *message[] = {”Hello “, “World”};
int i;

for(i = 0; i <>
printf(”%s”, message[i]);

printf(”\n”);

}


Seasoned professional
#include

#include

class string
{

private:

int size;

char *ptr;

public:
string() : size(0), ptr(new char(’\0′)) {}

string(const string &s) : size( s.size)
{
ptr = new char[size + 1];

strcpy(ptr, s.ptr);

}

~string()
{
delete [] ptr;

}

friend ostream &operator <<(ostream &, const string &);
string &operator=(const char *);
};

ostream &operator<<(ostream &stream, const string &s)
{
return(stream <<>

}

string &string::operator=(const char *chrs)
{
if (this != &chrs)
{

delete [] ptr;

size = strlen(chrs);
ptr = new char[size + 1];
strcpy(ptr, chrs);
}

return(*this);
}

int main()
{

string str;

str = “Hello World”;
cout <<>

return(0);
}


Master Programmer
[

uuid(2573F8F4-CFEE-101A-9A9F-00AA00342820)

]

library LHello

{

// bring in the master library

importlib(”actimp.tlb”);

importlib(”actexp.tlb”);

// bring in my interfaces
#include “pshlo.idl”

[
uuid(2573F8F5-CFEE-101A-9A9F-00AA00342820)
]

cotype THello

{

interface IHello;

interface IPersistFile;

};

};

[
exe,

uuid(2573F890-CFEE-101A-9A9F-00AA00342820)
]
module CHelloLib
{

// some code related header files
importheader(<>);
importheader(<>);

importheader(<>);

importheader(” pshlo.h”);

importheader(” shlo.hxx”);

importheader(” mycls.hxx”);

// needed typelibs
importlib(”actimp.tlb”);

importlib(” actexp.tlb”);

importlib(”thlo.tlb”);

[
uuid(2573F891-CFEE-101A-9A9F-00AA00342820),
aggregatable

]

coclass CHello
{

cotype THello;

};

};

#include “ipfix.hxx”

extern HANDLE hEvent;

class CHello : public CHelloBase
{

public:

IPFIX(CLSID_CHello);

CHello(IUnknown *pUnk);
~CHello();

HRESULT __stdcall PrintSz(LPWSTR pwszString);

private:
static int cObjRef;
};

#include <>
#include <>
#include <>

#include <>

#include ” thlo.h”

#include ” pshlo.h”

#include ” shlo.hxx “

#include ” mycls.hxx”

int CHello::cObjRef = 0;

CHello::CHello(IUnknown *pUnk) : CHelloBase(pUnk)
{
cObjRef++;
return;
}

HRESULT __stdcall CHello::PrintSz(LPWSTR pwszString)
{
printf(”%ws\n”, pwszString);
return(ResultFromScode(S_OK));
}

CHello::~CHello(void)
{

// when the object count goes to zero, stop the server
cObjRef–;
if( cObjRef == 0 )
PulseEvent(hEvent);

return;
}

#include
#include <>

#include “pshlo.h”

#include “shlo.hxx”

#include “mycls.hxx”

HANDLE hEvent;

int _cdecl main(
int argc,

char * argv[]

) {

ULONG ulRef;

DWORD dwRegistration;

CHelloCF *pCF = new CHelloCF();

hEvent = CreateEvent(NULL, FALSE, FALSE, NULL);

// Initialize the OLE libraries
CoInitializeEx(NULL, COINIT_MULTITHREADED);

CoRegisterClassObject(CLSID_CHello, pCF, CLSCTX_LOCAL_SERVER,
REGCLS_MULTIPLEUSE, &dwRegistration);

// wait on an event to stop
WaitForSingleObject(hEvent, INFINITE);

// revoke and release the class object
CoRevokeClassObject(dwRegistration);
ulRef = pCF->Release();

// Tell OLE we are going away.
CoUninitialize();

return(0);
}

extern CLSID CLSID_CHello;
extern UUID LIBID_CHelloLib;

CLSID CLSID_CHello = { _/* 2573F891-CFEE-101A-9A9F-00AA00342820 */
0×2573F891,
0xCFEE,
0×101A,
{ 0×9A, 0×9F, 0×00, 0xAA, 0×00, 0×34, 0×28, 0×20 }
};

UUID LIBID_CHelloLib = { _/* 2573F890-CFEE-101A-9A9F-00AA00342820 */
0×2573F890,
0xCFEE,

0×101A,

{ 0×9A, 0×9F, 0×00, 0xAA, 0×00, 0×34, 0×28, 0×20 }
};

#include
#include <>
#include <>

#include <>

#include <>

#include ” pshlo.h”
#include “shlo.hxx”

#include “clsid.h”

int _cdecl main(
int argc,

char * argv[]

) {

HRESULT hRslt;
IHello *pHello;
ULONG ulCnt;
IMoniker * pmk;
WCHAR wcsT[_MAX_PATH];
WCHAR wcsPath[2 * _MAX_PATH];

// get object path
wcsPath[0] = ‘\0′;
wcsT[0] = ‘\0′;
if( argc > 1) {
mbstowcs(wcsPath, argv[1], strlen(argv[1]) + 1);
wcsupr(wcsPath);
}
else {
fprintf(stderr, “Object path must be specified\n”);
return(1);
}

// get print string
if(argc > 2)

mbstowcs(wcsT, argv[2], strlen(argv[2]) + 1);
else
wcscpy(wcsT, L”Hello World”);

printf(”Linking to object %ws\n”, wcsPath);
printf(”Text String %ws\n”, wcsT);

// Initialize the OLE libraries
hRslt = CoInitializeEx(NULL, COINIT_MULTITHREADED);

if(SUCCEEDED(hRslt)) {

hRslt = CreateFileMoniker(wcsPath, &pmk);
if(SUCCEEDED(hRslt))
hRslt = BindMoniker(pmk, 0, IID_IHello, (void **)&pHello);

if(SUCCEEDED(hRslt)) {

// print a string out
pHello->PrintSz(wcsT);

Sleep(2000);
ulCnt = pHello->Release();

}

else

printf(”Failure to connect, status: %lx”, hRslt);

// Tell OLE we are going away.
CoUninitialize();
}

return(0);
}


———————————————————————————-

Output

HELLO WORLD

Jab output same hai to itni magajmari kyon ????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

WP Theme & Icons by N.Design Studio
Entries RSS Comments RSS Login